Thursday, June 21, 2007

Chat transcript with a buddy...

1:46 PM chat-buddy: do u believe in the funda of "bad time"

or its just human flaws and there is no external factor

1:47 PM me: I believe we are all miniscule contributers to universal probability !

chat-buddy: explain

me: :D howzzat for a philosophy

1:48 PM well it isn't jus human characteristics (why call them flaws if they make me beautiful).. it is a LOT of external factors as well

Some of them are straightforward right in front of us..and hence easy to perceive.. some of them are far away... but still affect us in finite ways

1:49 PM chat-buddy: hmm

me: its like P(A) = P(A/Cn) * P(Cn) + P(A/Cn-1) * P(Cn-1)... and so on

its an infinitely long equation

1:50 PM The people who claim "I don't believe in destiny.. i control my life" .. are merely trying to figure out as many of these finite Cn(s) as they can and try and control them. People who say "Jo hoga so hoga"... basically think the Cn(s) are way too many.. and try not to think about them !

But its all there.. whether you like it or not !

Kya bolta hai.. make any sense ?

1:51 PM chat-buddy: hmm..yea

how do u factor in time in the eqn

all the P(Cn) are varying

me: of course

so is the probability with time !

1:52 PM and that's what it means to say "maybe just the TIME was wrong" (context. Romeo and Juliet , Dire Straits)..

chat-buddy: he he

me: :D

ye thoda entertainment ke liye

par hua kya ?

chat-buddy: kuch nahi

me: hmm.. that can be a problem :)

1:53 PM chat-buddy: over the last 6 months..i hav been putting sincere effort into everything i do

but none of it translates to tangible results

i was jus wondering....coz i cant figure wat more/better i could hav done

1:54 PM me: yea.. mebbe there wasn't anything more you could have done

external factors not in your control... might have been responsible

chat-buddy: it leads to a question...how shd i maintain my confidence

me: Id say don beat yourself about it.

chat-buddy: im not beating...im jus tryin to find an explanation to it

..but human nature makes u introspective

me: introspective is fine

it is the search for that ONE factor that you think you might have been able to alter

1:56 PM and it helps you for next time... if you FIND one

but introspection can lead you to the result that you actually DID do everything you could have !

and then taht's alright

chat-buddy: true

ive realised confidence is one thing that can do wonders

me: actually the lack of it can do weird things to do

when you have it.. yer working full potential.. that's alL ! :)

1:58 PM it jus lets you do everything that you are capable off

thats it..

but human nature is such that we lose it very quickly

and so we;re rarely working at that level !

1:59 PM Anyway.. I'm an-atheist.. so all my philosophy.. follows the same route...

2:00 PM "Faith" that a lot of "believers" talk about.. to me is basically an artificial (??) means to bolster your own confidence... taht lets you work at close to full potential...

And it works for a lot of people :)

Used to work for me when I was younger

(much younger ;-/)

chat-buddy: hmm :)

2:01 PM me: Book likh daalu kya bol ?! ;)

chat-buddy: haan..haan...bilkul

me: hahah :D

chat-buddy: :P

me: the only way I can ever get rich ;)

Thursday, June 14, 2007

The Bitch Brigade...

There are days when I jus can't "HELP" being bitchy.. and NO.. it DOESN'T have to do with 'that-time-of-the-month'.

I'm like that dude "Partho" in "Honeymoon Travels Pvt Ltd"...

I HATE myself after it..and I can't control myself before it.. and now I feel like banging my head against a wall.. Cept that it won't help my situation at all..

I REALLY need something to do in the evenings... I really REALLY do !! :(

And I have no friends... I really don't.. the only people who (sort of) like me.. are either on the other end of the country or the other side of the planet..

Dis SUX man !